I know that you are out there somewhere. And I'm looking. I really am, I hope you don't think I've given up. Because I'm too young to give up on you. And I know that somewhere out there you are looking too. Or at this exact moment you might not be looking for me, but you are preparing yourself for me. And if you happen to be someone who follows my rantings on my blog I'm sorry if I come off as a brat. I don't mean to be. And I'm sorry if it seems like I'm head over heels for a couple of other guys. They've just been a major part in getting me to where I am. And if you happen to be one of them you already know this. I look forward to meeting you and I am trying to be better myself. Sometimes I feel like giving up, but then I don't. And don't be too dissappointed if I make the first move. It's been a year since I've been on a date and I've never been asked. But I'm not really that bitter. Honestly. I try to take everything in stride. And you are out there somewhere. But you better not be sitting around waitng for me to find you because it ain't happening. I'm never going to find you if you aren't looking for me. and i realize that this doesn't work in real life when someone gets lost, one person should stay put. But this isn't life, this is marriage and we both need to be looking. Good luck in finding me. ;)
Always,
Unit of Energy
Friday, February 27, 2009
Friday, February 20, 2009
Ha! Miss Inappropriate is better than you
So, I just thought Sam should know that my blog is more family friendly that his is.
Learning to Take
To those of you who know me and have heard my life/wedding/birthday plans, many of which involve ways to get people to give me stuff this post may be a surprise. While I love people to give me things (who doesn't), I hate having to ask for people to give me things. Especially important life sustaining things like food. It is one of the hardest things to realize that you don't have the money to buy a box of sweethearts, my favorite thing about valentines day. They were only 30 cents. That was a very sad day. So I was surviving on basically an apple a day. And now I have received food from two different sources. But you have no idea how hard it is to sit there and have to take advantage of people and their generosity. But I'm getting more hours at work now and will be able to feed myself soon. But if anyone has an extra VCR I'll take it ;) Yes I want one, no I don't really expect anyone to give me one and will likely be a tad embarrassed if you get me one. And I work today and tomorrow so I'm getting fed well today and tomorrow.
Friday, February 13, 2009
Friends
So I have some pretty great friends. Who apparently worry about whether they should drag me to the hospital or not. I say not, seeing as an hour of sleep makes even the worst of headaches go away, at least for awhile. And I have friends that anomously give me food, which is pretty great too. Seeing as I can't spend any money at all between now and my next paycheck in two weeks if I plan on paying my rent. Which means that I'm basically stuck at home for the next two to four weeks. I really need to find someone to ask me on a date. Because I'm of the school of thought that says that the person who asks is the person that pays. And I have some food here, and my job feeds me on the days that i work. So I'm going to be catching up soon. And someday these insane money troubles will be over.
Tuesday, February 10, 2009
Another round of tears
Why am I such an emotional person? I never used to be. Until...crap. I just realized that my getting randomly emotional started with Mish. Oh, it didn't always revolve around him, but it started around the time when we started being really good friends. So anyhow, this new round was brought on by my recieving his mission address. I don't know why I care. I'm young, beautiful and make my roomates jealous by dressing cute for no reason. And I don't date, I sit at home blogging about a guy that I don't even care about like that anyome and cry. I hate this. I really need to get out more. But it's hard. And I'm poor. I watch my friends date, get married, go on missions, have kids, and I fell left out. What am I doing with my life? Nothing. Paying bills to go to school to get a degree that won't even pay that well when I'm done. And I write papers on marriage. Yes, I have a strange fascination with the subject. I can relate pretty much any topic back to marriage and write a convincing arguement. Movies? The theme I find always involves love or marriage. Shakespeare? The many marriage practices evident in one or another of the plays. Art? She looks sad, her husband must be away. Family Life? How I'm preparing for marriage. I will admit that I have also had many papers with marriage as the assigned topic. I once had to write a paper on marriage and preparing for marriage based on a chapter in Genesis. And one semester I had to write three or four papers on marriage in my various classes. So I learned so much from researching those that I've just carried that knowledge over. But however much I love marriage, there is no one that I have met that I would marry at this moment. And there was a point in my life that I was going to possibly wait for Mish to come home from his mission before I got married, but I've given up on that. I've rather given up on ever being asked out too. I'm going to be a single, poor, lonely set designer for the rest of my life. I hate this. And on being a set designer, I'm going to be assistant scenic designer on another production this season. I hope it turns out all right.
Friday, February 6, 2009
A Guide to Unit's insults
If I am in hysterics, I don't actually mean anything by any perceived insult. I'm too high to care. And yes I do call this a high. It is self induced without the aid of any chemical or controlled substance, but it is a high none the less. I have friends who don't let me drink caffeine because I'm crazy enough without it.
If I throw a fork at you it means that I'm an a slightly angered person looking for a mob to gang up with to drive you out. The force behind the throw indicates how much I actually mean it. More force = more meaning.
If I drop a knife at your feet it means I like you and am flustered by your presence.
If I throw a knife at you you should be scared. This is a sign that I seriously don't like you. Learn the difference between dropping and throwing.
If I tell you stories about slashing boxes violently, I'm testing you, to see if you still trust me enough not to beg for a room/ward/girlfriend/friend change.
As for spoons, I don't really throw spoons around. I'm not sure what it would mean
If I refer to Jorge or sad cows I'm in a bad mood, not insulting you. Jorge cheers me up.
I generally don't insult people. I promise. If I refuse to speak to you except through a computer I am not trying to insult you.
And if there is some random thing I do that you think might have some secret meaning, it probably does, and I want to hear your thoughts on the matter.
If I throw a fork at you it means that I'm an a slightly angered person looking for a mob to gang up with to drive you out. The force behind the throw indicates how much I actually mean it. More force = more meaning.
If I drop a knife at your feet it means I like you and am flustered by your presence.
If I throw a knife at you you should be scared. This is a sign that I seriously don't like you. Learn the difference between dropping and throwing.
If I tell you stories about slashing boxes violently, I'm testing you, to see if you still trust me enough not to beg for a room/ward/girlfriend/friend change.
As for spoons, I don't really throw spoons around. I'm not sure what it would mean
If I refer to Jorge or sad cows I'm in a bad mood, not insulting you. Jorge cheers me up.
I generally don't insult people. I promise. If I refuse to speak to you except through a computer I am not trying to insult you.
And if there is some random thing I do that you think might have some secret meaning, it probably does, and I want to hear your thoughts on the matter.
Sunday, February 1, 2009
bitterness
I don't know why people don't pay attention to me when I post tags I recieve. Because I was tagged again. And I don't feel like coming up with another seven random things about me. But I might. But I don't feel like mentioning who tagged me. Stupid roommate's boyfriend. You know who you are, and you know that I don't actually hate you, and by now you probably know why I haven't been in the greatest mood this weekend. Stupid boys and stupid headaches and stupid stomach aches. So today's random facts about me will revolve around my bitterness this weekend.
1. I don't like to be ignored by people. I don't really care if they are people who actually don't know me, if I recognize them I feel like they should recognize me.
2. I don't like sending people away. And I refuse to wait for four years for various missionaries to get home before I get married. I can decide for myself while they are gone.
3. I don't like it when people ask stupid questions. Honestly you are in college for crying out loud, you should already have some idea about the constitutional process and scientific method. And you should be able to understand simple instructions about assignments.
4. Money was invented by the Devil so that I would have emotional breakdowns at random times in public places so that I would never get asked on dates.
5. So were scissors.
6. I love my job but and my boss and my co-workers but they get on my nerves sometimes. Honestly, how hard is it to come down and hold the stupid monitor, it's your responsability as floor director, not mine. I'm the TOC/redhat.
7. I don't really care to solve peoples problems for them. Under most circumstances any way. If you've got a problem go find someone who cares. I have my own problems to deal with, I don't want to worry about if your roommate is doing her chores or not. Or if her boyfriend should be dumped or not. If you have to ask people if your stupid boyfriend is treating you right when he dates other girls you are an idiot. (and I promise this is not directed at anyone you know, I may be bitter right now, but that doesn't mean I want to drive a wedge between the friends I actually have. Or think I have)
Ok, so I'm actually a lot bitter tonight and you get to hear a lot more than seven things.
8. I hate when people think that I'm a happy person when I'm actually struggling a lot. So I can hide my emotions really well sometimes. And I'm a generally happy person. get over it and get to know me so that I can trust you with the real me.
9. My sister is barely 18. And she'll have a degree in less than a year. And I've been in college for four years and still there's not much of an end in sight.
10. I'm still in college. I was supposed to be graduating this year. I was going to be gone before Falsetto got back and now he'll be back when my sister gets here. And I'll still have a year and a half left. Before my first degree. Stupid sister. And Falsetto.
11. Morons who don't know how to drive. And nearly kill me and my roommate while out grocery shopping. Come on, if a car is moving you don't come rushing towards them. And if people are crossing the street you stop and and let them by. Idiots.
12. Laundry. Come on, why do they build the laundry room so far away from my apartment. It is the most dumb thing ever. And making me walk in the cold outdoors. Stupid.
13.Art class. I really don't care were the vanishing point is. I'm only here because I have to be. And I think it's kind of dumb that I have to be here. I'm a theater major and really good at technical drawings. Why do I have to be good at the artistic ones too?
14. Living on campus sucks. Just saying. I'm so ready to leave, but I don't think I'll be able to. Stupid deposits.
15. Dan never dies. The stupid evil manipulative man. Why won't he just go away. Yes, some may say that I get way to involved in my TV shows. And yes, I haven't actually caught up to the current season yet. But still.
16. Research projects. I hate homework. Why do I care about who did what with their recent production of Twelfth Night. Or how current political, social and economical trends affect the production of Twelfth Night.
17. Running out of things to be bitter about. I only wallow once in a while. Why can't I find more things to be bitter about. Why do I have to live a life with so much good in it. It really gets on my nerves when looking to be bitter.
1. I don't like to be ignored by people. I don't really care if they are people who actually don't know me, if I recognize them I feel like they should recognize me.
2. I don't like sending people away. And I refuse to wait for four years for various missionaries to get home before I get married. I can decide for myself while they are gone.
3. I don't like it when people ask stupid questions. Honestly you are in college for crying out loud, you should already have some idea about the constitutional process and scientific method. And you should be able to understand simple instructions about assignments.
4. Money was invented by the Devil so that I would have emotional breakdowns at random times in public places so that I would never get asked on dates.
5. So were scissors.
6. I love my job but and my boss and my co-workers but they get on my nerves sometimes. Honestly, how hard is it to come down and hold the stupid monitor, it's your responsability as floor director, not mine. I'm the TOC/redhat.
7. I don't really care to solve peoples problems for them. Under most circumstances any way. If you've got a problem go find someone who cares. I have my own problems to deal with, I don't want to worry about if your roommate is doing her chores or not. Or if her boyfriend should be dumped or not. If you have to ask people if your stupid boyfriend is treating you right when he dates other girls you are an idiot. (and I promise this is not directed at anyone you know, I may be bitter right now, but that doesn't mean I want to drive a wedge between the friends I actually have. Or think I have)
Ok, so I'm actually a lot bitter tonight and you get to hear a lot more than seven things.
8. I hate when people think that I'm a happy person when I'm actually struggling a lot. So I can hide my emotions really well sometimes. And I'm a generally happy person. get over it and get to know me so that I can trust you with the real me.
9. My sister is barely 18. And she'll have a degree in less than a year. And I've been in college for four years and still there's not much of an end in sight.
10. I'm still in college. I was supposed to be graduating this year. I was going to be gone before Falsetto got back and now he'll be back when my sister gets here. And I'll still have a year and a half left. Before my first degree. Stupid sister. And Falsetto.
11. Morons who don't know how to drive. And nearly kill me and my roommate while out grocery shopping. Come on, if a car is moving you don't come rushing towards them. And if people are crossing the street you stop and and let them by. Idiots.
12. Laundry. Come on, why do they build the laundry room so far away from my apartment. It is the most dumb thing ever. And making me walk in the cold outdoors. Stupid.
13.Art class. I really don't care were the vanishing point is. I'm only here because I have to be. And I think it's kind of dumb that I have to be here. I'm a theater major and really good at technical drawings. Why do I have to be good at the artistic ones too?
14. Living on campus sucks. Just saying. I'm so ready to leave, but I don't think I'll be able to. Stupid deposits.
15. Dan never dies. The stupid evil manipulative man. Why won't he just go away. Yes, some may say that I get way to involved in my TV shows. And yes, I haven't actually caught up to the current season yet. But still.
16. Research projects. I hate homework. Why do I care about who did what with their recent production of Twelfth Night. Or how current political, social and economical trends affect the production of Twelfth Night.
17. Running out of things to be bitter about. I only wallow once in a while. Why can't I find more things to be bitter about. Why do I have to live a life with so much good in it. It really gets on my nerves when looking to be bitter.
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